Monday Morning Muster - Memories

**bennyball2** · 05-12-2006, 13:32

Bravo company marching on in Lemgo with Puttys tucked into our trousers, berets as issued, no sewn in creases, they were the days???

**ap1** · 05-12-2006, 17:18

John that is one of the funniest stories I've read on this forum.......Quality :-)

UKSniper · 05-12-2006, 17:19

Removing boots to allow the RSM {Alan Harrhy} to check for army issue socks.

RP get him away.

**ap1** · 05-12-2006, 18:07

Heres another one from Berlin.

The CO, Col Bob Lloyd realised many of us in the 1st Bn did'nt know the words to the Welsh National Anthem.(I think we were all caught out "Doing a John Redwood" at a boxing event).

We were all give a short time to learn the words properly, and on the following monday morning muster, Col Lloyd called out some unfortunate wretch to sing the anthem in front of the Bn, it was the equivalent of car crash TV, you know you don't want to watch, but you can't help yourself

.....I was a SNCO then, and I can still remember desperately trying to hide behind Jinx 38.

This went on for a number of weeks, I think at some point he selected a random group of SNCO's to sing.....not good, but problem solved.

**John Turner** · 05-12-2006, 19:15

Off topic for just a sec if that's OK ...... could we have bluffed Bob Lloyd with this - wish I had not been posted away from the Bn when this was going on as I have always known about this ........ I would have just had to try it on!!!

Many phonetic versions of the Welsh National Anthem (Mae hen Wlad fy Nhadau) have been written for non-Welsh speakers. This one is by the splendid Swansea poet Nigel Jenkins.

Don't worry - there are pictures underneath for Val! (Sorry)

My hen laid a haddock, one hand oiled a flea,

Glad farts and centurions threw dogs in the sea,

I could stew a hare here and brandish Dan’s flan,

Don’s ruddy bog’s blocked up with sand.

Dad ! Dad! Why don’t you oil Auntie Glad ?

Can whores appear in beer bottle pies,

O butter the hens as they fly !

daibeer · 06-12-2006, 15:02

I was (almost) resident Duty Bugler in Lemgo, or if I wasnt, I ended up it, after the first two got jailed after messing up the Bugle calls. Everyone used to ask me if I was ever worried standing in front of RSM Cooper on Bn Muster. Well the secret was to stay in Bills bar until about 0430hrs come in, shower and change for muster. I could never remember Muster. That's how.

**CARL PUGH** · 07-12-2006, 20:39

I remember lemgo, in 4 PL on muster standing next to my best mate at the time our little Steve Cooper, thinking i was safe as Dad usually stayed away (WRONG). Well that morning he was doing a wander and stopped in front of his son, and asked him who had pressed his kit. The answer was same person as you Mum. Well i nearly fell over, hence to say we were marching down the road. Also when the RP came over, and came to a halt some change fell out of his pocket, so the Mighty Mouse said put your self away an all.. i always thought he liked me as i did go round his house for dinner once.

**ap1** · 07-12-2006, 20:52

Originally Posted by CARL PUGH

I remember lemgo, in 4 PL on muster standing next to my best mate at the time our little Steve Cooper, thinking i was safe as Dad usually stayed away (WRONG). Well that morning he was doing a wander and stopped in front of his son, and asked him who had pressed his kit. The answer was same person as you, Mum.

I remember that Pug, quality

rolli25 · 08-12-2006, 00:06

I remember in Lemgo when mighy mouse roared as the national anthem was being played and Alan Macandrew RP at the time was smiling from the NAAFI window not standing to attention-we didnt see him walk but we knew where he was going - Im surprised I remember that as I didnt turn up for most of them. Might have been a drum service

**John Turner** · 08-12-2006, 00:21

I've got a non-Bn Muster Story. In fact I'm not sure if it was a muster - no - it would have been a drill period - sod it - mastermind (started so I'll finish)

IJLB Oswestry - 1971 - Drill Pig a fearsome Irish Guards WOII. In normal conversation he had a bit of a stutter - but not when screaming words of command.

There was a lad in our intake called Parsons - D&Ds - who also had a stutter - a long gangly thing - sort of guy that would look like **** in a Versace suit - never seemed to be standing straight.

Anyway, Drill Pig spots him and stomps over.....

"Wh Wh Wh What's your n-n-n-ame s-s-son?"

"P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-arsons, S-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-ir"

ARE YOU T-T-T-T-TAKING THE P-P-P-P-P-P-ISS L-L-LAD!"

"N-N-N-N--N-NN-N-N-N-N-N-N--N---N-NNNNNN OOOOOO S-S-S-S-SIR"!

God I can hardly see the screen to press 'submit reply'!