Total Frankenthread.

[John Turner]

OK - What's a 'Frankenthread'?

Well it's (very vague) forum-speak for going off topic - someone starts a topic about, say, flower arranging, and then someone starts going on about vases, what sort of water to use ..... and it ends up with just two people talking about their holidays in the Costa Del friggin' Sol.

Which could, of course happen in your average conversation at home/down the pub.

So, here's a thread where you can change the subject any time you like - I'll start - enjoy!

Today my car came back from the Direct line insurance-approved garage after being repaired from an argument it lost with a wooden bollard in our community centre car park. (Both offside doors & sills plus drivers window - looked like a 432 had hit it side on)

My wife said it was in the car's 'blind spot' - I said the only friggin' blind spot the car has is on the driver's seat when she is occupying it!

Anyway - the car does 47 MPG combined - the highest I've seen the MPG display is 60 mpg on a nice long run (LOFs Cardiff actually) and the lowest 36 mpg after a few weeks of very short journeys, never using 5th or 6th gear (6 speed manual diesel)

When I got it back the MPG display read 29 mpg - I've never ever seen it that low - I reckon a mechanic or two, probably not ever seeing one of these cars before (Dodge Caliber SXT sport) took it for a spin and thrashed it.

What do you reckon - and what do you drive anyway, or drink?

And who invented liquid soap, and why?

[5haron]

My wife said it was in the car's 'blind spot' - I said the only friggin' blind spot the car has is on the driver's seat when she is occupying it!

Hmmm. MCP behind the wheel JT?

One of our neighbours (a right twll din) once tried to con our insurance by saying that something G had left on square behind the houses had fallen on his car and damaged it. I was willing to pay if G was the culprit and indeed wouldn't have said anything usually but I just didn't like this man, so just to be arsey I asked the insurance to investigate. Turns out it couldnt have been what he said and was a result of something similar to your bollard experience. Driver error. Oooh, the dirty looks we get..hahaha.

[John Turner]

Hmmm. MCP behind the wheel JT?

No, I don't think so, neither of us are Microsoft Certified Professionals. http://www.thegrumble.com/thegrumble/public_html/ubb/graemlins/shrug.gif

Anyway - the cloud has had a silver lining - in 2007, when we bought this car new (OK, it was a demo model but it only had 30 miles on the clock - it was 'new') It was a bit of an impulse buy - Volvos is what we were looking for - but I really wanted to spend the amount that we were willing to spend - on a used Merc, I've always wanted a Mercedes.

I test drove the Dodge; Pat didn't. She said 'As long as you're happy .......' and ended up absolutely HATING the damn thing! But we kept our battered old (93) Volvo 940 estate, that thrives on neglect, as a workhorse - and it ended up as Pat's car.

So now - Pat feeling slightly sheepish and guilty, and me milking that to the max - we've looked at used Mercs - long and hard, and, to cut a long story short, will be picking up a Navy Blue CLK 320 Avantagarde tomorrow that we both test drove and fell in love with on Sunday - what a car - OUR car. Still hanging on to the old Volvo though - which just flew through its MOT again - just so we can deliver large items and/or make amenity tip runs.

We'll actually walk with some change from the Merc/Dodge PX deal too!

Unless money was no object, I'd never EVER buy a new car in this country again.

So - is anyone going to hijack this thread or am I going to have to do it myself?

[davidrmac]

John , your in business mate , don't buy em , lease em . Takes all the worry and depreciation out of motoring . You can have a brand new Mercedes every two years like me , yippee .

[HOWIE WILLIAMS]

The bloke who lives next door to me, Rhys, lovely fella, works for a bank in their leasing department always manages to get me tickets for the six nations games. Last time we went down was on the train directly from Wrexham to Cardiff. A lot cheaper if you buy a ticket from Wrexham to Shrewsbury and then another from Shrewsbury to Cardiff than if you buy one straight from Wrexham to Cardiff, strange but true!

[John Turner]

Last time I bought a train ticket I asked for a day return and the ticket bloke said "Where to"

So I said "Back here of course, you pillock"

[HOWIE WILLIAMS]

Ticket to ride, one of my all time favourite Beatles songs.

[John Turner]

John , your in business mate , don't buy em , lease em .

Well, I run a shop - it's a 'business' I know, but I never, or very rarely travel on business and I'm not fussed about permanent monthly payments, I'd rather own outright.

The Volvo's registered to the business.

[Thom15]

I try to mind my own business but now and again I get caught up in other peoples business, especially on trains. However, if the business is interesting then why not join in the conversation. Some train rides are far to long and soon you'll find everybody sticking their nose in your business, which was not your business in the first place.
Hmmm! now where was I?